tiger is gone.

that was during April, when he is still well & healthy. i still can't believe it. i chose to put Tiger to sleep. :'( i really don't want to see him suffering. went to the vet just now afternoon wf thirdsis, rushed from school cs his condition got worse. his saliva dripped non-stop from his mouth, pus around his eyes. vet opened his mouth wide, and we saw some kind like mouth sores at the end, like ulcers.. but worse. that were one of the symptoms for FIV, cats kind of HIV. had a blood test, & it showed positive. Tiger got infected by FIV. like HIV, it's permanent. & can spread to other cats. he was all weak, even tho vet said it was merely about a week. there were two solution; take medicine but his condition will only be slightly better and can NEVER be normal again or end his suffering & put him to sleep. thirdsis & me started to tear right after vet asked us to discuss what we wana do about him. but we never say a word, we cried right there. cs deep down i know that Tiger is suffering, and keeping him longer will just bring more pain to him. took quite a long time to decide. he kept on purring, and looking at us.. that made it even harder to let him go just like that. we couldn't control our tears. i cried right after the vet suggested about what to do, till i saw him put to sleep peacefully. when the vet injected him, about just 5 seconds.. he was already gone. i don't know why i kept on saying im sorry im sorry in my head. i felt so bad. it was my first time, seeing my own pet dies in front of my eyes. he didn't struggle, not even a tiny bit. i'm sorry Tiger for putting you to sleep forever. i just wana stop that pain & suffering you've been enduring. i feel guilty, seriously. i'm gona miss him being there right at our doorstep, hearing him purring when we petted him.. i'm sorry Tiger. :'(